Clap Along If You Feel Like Happiness is the Truth

What is happiness? How do we access it? Is it really as elusive as we sometimes feel it is?

Perhaps happiness is like a liquid; its form takes the shape of its container. Maybe it is different for everyone, or does it generally feel the same to all, just triggered and sustained differently for each individual? And, is it possible to be happy even when you feel like you're lacking something so integral to your contentment?

There is a ton of research out there on what happiness is, how to find it, and how to maintain it. After all, everyone wants to be happy and feel good. And that leads us to a basic understanding of happiness. It is an emotion –– an emotional and mental state of well-being defined by a pleasant feeling that ranges from basic contentment to intense joy.

We know that "happiness" is not necessarily about feeling good all the time. The ups and downs are what allow us to feel true happiness. You can only feel genuine joy if you have something to compare it to. It's about the mountains and valleys of life –– the accomplishments, the successes, that are born from struggle.

In saying as much, happiness seems to be a satisfaction with one's life. It isn't about money (beyond freedom from financial worry and enough to live comfortably and perhaps indulge every now and then). It's mostly not about anything material actually. Happy, winner of a handful of Best Documentary and Audience Choice awards portrays that some of the happiest people in the world live by simple simple means. Additionally, I don't know a statistic, but it's a known fact that some of the richest people are the most unhappy. It isn't about what we have per se, but how we understand and process it.

Not surprisingly, your genes, environmental factors (like life circumstances and things that happen to and around you), social relationships, accomplishments, etc., all affect your happiness. As does your way of thinking. Psychologists suggest that much of your happiness is under your personal control. Taking care of yourself, challenging yourself, setting and meeting goals, maintaining close social connections, and finding purpose beyond yourself are all ways that you can increase your life satisfaction and be happier.

Perhaps you think happiness lies in finding your spouse –– someone to share your life with, someone to connect with, take care of, someone to take care of you. You might even understand that your spouse won't be your everything, but this close connection with someone will certainly cause those feel good chemicals in your brain to proliferate. You wouldn't be wrong.

Speaking of which, there are four known natural chemicals that contribute to someone feeling happy: dopamine, oxytocin, serotonin, and endorphins ("DOSE"). 

Dopamine is neurotransmitter, which means that it is responsible for transmitting messages in your brain. It is important for many things in your brain, but for our intents and purposes, it's the chemical we talk about when we say things like "pleasure or motivation pathways." It's about reward and reinforcement, the thing that makes things that we like feel good. 

Oxytocin, also known as the "cuddle hormone," is triggered when you feel close to another person. It doesn't have to be physical closeness, although physical touch does release oxytocin. Emotional connectedness, eye contact, attentiveness, social bonding, and the like all create oxytocin too.

Serotonin is most associated with mood. Like dopamine, it is a neurotransmitter that relays signals between neurons. It plays major roles in one's mood, feelings of anxiety, and happiness. Mood altering drugs like Ecstasy and LSD are known to tremendously increase levels of serotonin in one's brain. Serotonin is also known to be directly related to depression. In fact, the most popular antidepressants are SSRI's –– selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors. Other medications that treat depression work on serotonin in other ways. (Despite understanding the association of mood and serotonin, scientists do not yet know precisely how they work, and we are still unable to measure levels of serotonin in the brain.) 

Serotonin plays an important role in how we feel, and there are many natural ways to boost one's serotonin levels. Mood induction, altering one's thoughts, either through psychotherapy or self-help, can increase levels of serotonin (it seems like the interaction between serotonin function and mood is a two-way relationship). Natural light is another thing known to increase serotonin synthesis and help with mood. Exercise has an antidepressant effect too, and some research has suggested that it can increase brain serotonin function. Healthy nutrition and eating foods that have higher levels of tryptophan could be linked to improved mood and cognition, possibly due to increased serotonin levels.

Lastly, endorphins are hormones that are responsible for masking pain or discomfort, as they are associated with our "fight or flight" reflex. They are said to be like morphine, reducing pain and increasing positive feelings. Endorphins are released during exercise and other strenuous acts, in response to physical or emotional pain, and triggered by eating, drinking, connecting with others, and other pleasurable activities. 

So yes, of the four "feel good chemicals," a close loving relationship would probably increase all. However, there are other ways to trigger them as well. Fostering other close social relationships is a good example. You can be happy without a relationship, even if it's more difficult. You just have to work a little harder.

Happiness is contentment. Happiness is letting go what you think should have been and accepting what is. Happiness is living for the moment. Happiness is accomplishing a long awaited goal. Happiness is having a purpose. Happiness is loving and being loved. Happiness is being motivated to do what I need to to feel good about myself. Happiness is recognizing that what I'm chasing was within me all along. Happiness is having a real friend who cares. Happiness is curling up by a fireplace on a cold snowy day with someone you love. Happiness is watching someone else experience something you love for the first time and the look of appreciation on his face. Happiness is driving along the highway with the windows down on a perfect spring day. Happiness is when someone returns your genuine smile and you know you made his day. Happiness is when you can focus on all the good things you have in life. Happiness is a choice.